Start being you...the cost of masking

Masking, like most things in life, has a few sides to it. Both neurotypical and neurodivergent individuals engage in masking, though the costs incurred of its use will vary dramatically as a result of your neurotype. Inherently, the use of masking is really about safety. At times that safety is for yourself with others and at times it is for safety with yourself (yes, you can also mask from and to yourself).

This article highlights masking as avoidance of harm : https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8992921/

Masking can be more costly if you are unaware, unsure as to why and how you employ it, and if you are absent from the decision making to use it. Neurodivergent individuals may experience the following:

·      Mental, physical and emotional exhaustion

·      Meltdowns when capacity levels reach too low

·      Feeling of not fitting in, not having ‘real’ relationships

·      Feeling unknown in relationships and related loneliness

·      Difficulty being seen and as a result, getting support

·      Social anxiety and related anticipatory worry when engagement is expected

·      Challenges in knowing your own identity

·      Distortions with self-perception

·      Challenges with self-esteem and beliefs about self

·      Inability to measure your own capacity

·      Feelings of inadequacy or feeling incapable

·      Difficulty receiving a diagnosis

·      Dysregulation and challenges to focus

·      Symptoms of depression

How you understand yourself, knowing the why of behavior gives you more choice as to whether you continue to do it, such as masking. If you are missing information about yourself such as traits, neurotype, or diagnosis, it’s difficult to understand who you are and to be exactly the person you are to be.  This can be applied to an autism diagnosis or anything else. Bottom line…be you, as best you can and when you can…you are the only one who has the capability to do so.